Buy Into It

What has happened to me? I just don't know anymore.

I don't know when or where it happened. But it did. Somewhere down the line someone told me I wasn't good enough. And I believed them. Was it a person in particular or society in general?

(Sorry this post has been so-far emo. I'm just a little crazy sometimes. Newspaper makes me crazy)

When I bought into it, was when I started performing sub-par. I can't write anymore. I can't design. I can't lead. I can't... function. What has happened and how do I fix it?

Yeah, you say to just tell yourself that I'm good enough, but everyone on the internet knows that isn't that easy. In fact, it truly accomplishes nothing. Nothing.

I can't have any more nights at school this late. I can't lead a newspaper. I'm the most unqualified human on the face of the planet. Jon Gosselin might be more qualified to work InDesign than I am. That's saying a lot.

Ugghhhh. Sorry. I'm frustrated and I warned you in the title... it will be a feverish rant.

I'm going to sleep. I'm going to sleep on it. Maybe I'll feel better in the A.M. and after this semester is over... maybe not? We'll see.

Wedding/England/Cruise Slimdown

The slimdown has once again commenced.

I need to lose some massive poundage. I will be eating better, going to the gym, and trying to feel better about myself all around. I've been a little down recently, but I think it's just because I'm tired and I haven't been performing at school the way I know that I should and can. I'm gonna try, tho.

I'm sorry this one is so short. I'm exhausted. Love you all.

-Lauren Rose

So the good boys and girls take the so called 'right track'...

Hey kiddies. It has been a LONG time since I last updated. I'm very sorry. I did not know that people actually read my blog.

Welp, I am bogged down with school. Everything centers around that right now. Class, homework, newspaper, more newspaper, covering stuff for newspaper, and so on and so forth. Thus is my life. And is it even paying off? I've been doing so well the past couple of semesters and then I get a paper back today that made me reconsider my post grad work altogether. It was complete crap. I cannot excuse it. My writing failed me. That never, ever happens. I am a good writer. Right? I do not care as much about the grade as I do about the teacher thinking I am too dumb to tie my shoes properly.

Tonight was the school pep rally. I cannot believe I went. However, they were giving out free homecoming t-shirts and you know I wanted one of those. It was a little weird because nothing much happened at the rally. It wasn't even a cool pep rally like from Grease. Oh NO! I did get to see some people that I miss though, so that is good.

I am going to have to have surgery in two weeks. I am a little worried. Not about anything big, just the pain. I will be numbed but the sound of the drill inside my head hurts me.

Okay, well I cannot keep my eyes open. Night all.

Love-
Lauren Rose

Sickly...

I am sick :(

Other than that: life is awesome! In my mind busy=awesome. I hate having nothing to do.

I am busy with school. I had an interview with the school president this morning. He is such a nice man. I love when people love Shorter and are hospitable! Yay!

I have a thing for guys in the military. I can't help it. I know it's cliche. I think it's a power thing.

Well, I'm going to bed. I promise I'll write a real entry at some point. I took Thera Flu and I'm going to pass out SOON! Night.

Too Tired to Function

First day of school, eh? I get how you're going to be.

I haven't stopped all day. I like it, though. I like being busy.

Here's the rundown.
1) Woke up.
2) Class at 9 -- Historical Methods with Morris (sadly, I dropped this class and replaced it. Bye bye Dr. Morris)
3) Class at 10 -- History of England with Morris (YAY)
4) Break around campus
5) Class at 12 -- Intro to Philosophy with Werner (Ugh, I'm not going to like this one)
6) Class at 1 -- Shakespeare with Vosevich ( I am SO excited!)
7) Lunch and meeting with newspaper staff
8) Newspaper class at 3 (SO many more writers than we thought, YAY)
9) Bunch of junk... until present.

I'm home. I am sorry it's so terse however I'm too tired to function. Must sleep. Night lovelies.

<3 Lauren Rose

Just Call Me Rory Gilmore...

Well today's been eventful.

I woke up.
I showered.
I went to the Barnes.
I drove around.
I went to school.
I learned about the newspaper.
I got excited about the newspaper.
I went to Michael's.
I ate at Gondelier's.
I came home.
I talked to the rents.
I wrote an essay.
I'm procrastinating.

I'm too excited about the newspaper. I'm nervous that I won't be good at it, but we'll see. I guess that's all I can say.

I am currently procrastinating. I need to write more essays. I'm just so tired. This is not the way to start the semester. Yuck.
I'm going to do it, and keep up with M.E.N.

Night guys <3

These Boots Were Made for Walkin

Do I now have to make my blog more interesting/appealing because people might actually read it? Haha, that's a lot of pressure.

So, the gym kicked my tail today. We moved on to strength training. Yuck! Maybe one day I'll look like this...


Maybe one day...

Anyway -- I'm feeling like we should discuss the awesome antique store visit I had. I should let you know that I am normally hesitant to go to antique stores with Nikki because I know that this means hours in a hot-never-ending room of other people's junk. Well, my mind has been changed. I've become a believer! I found some awesome stuff. I found some jewelry ($4), 3 Mediterranean inspired vases ($8), a Jordan Knight fashion figure.. aka doll.. for Kortney, and (THE STEAL OF MY LIFE) a pair of awesome cowboy boots for only $18. This is unheard of! Similar boots that I was looking at were close to $200. That's outrageous! I think it's important to note that I am not a redneck for purchasng boots. I am merely feeling the cowgirl boot trend that's going on right now. That is all.

Mine are similar to this without the fashionably backwards embroidered sunflowers on the side. Maybe those are daisies. Anyone a botanist around here?

Anyway, I am a believer now!

Let's talk about excitement: I'm excited about Chris Cannon's bonfire at his house :) It should be a lot of fun right before school starts. Plus, I love bonfires. Everything, well almost everything (I'm afraid of fire), is perfect at a bonfire. People look so much better in the glow of a blazing fire. Does that make me sound like David Berkowitz or something? I hope not!

In other news... I tuned a mandolin today. Yes, folks, you heard me correctly. A mandolin. I didn't know people ear-tuned mandolins anymore. Well people who aren't Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs, at least. My dad was fairly excited that I tuned that for him, I think. So that's good. It was offensive how terrible it sounded because it was so badly out of tune. So I watched this man who looked like a mixture of the dude from Reading Rainbow and Simon/Garfunkel (always confuse them so it's easier to group into one category) tune a mandolin on Youtube and then I followed suit. This was a learning process for me. So thanks Reading Rainbow - Simon/Garfunkel man.

It should be mentioned how I think Garfunkel is the coolest name on the planet. But that's another post for another time.

Well, I'm going to go email Dr. Morris. That sounds more intriguing than it really is. So I'll leave you with that.

<3 Lauren Rose